Unveiling the Taboo: Sex Ed

My first real introduction to sex was when I was 8. I remember sitting on the floor of my grandmother's living room with my older sister and younger cousin and my nan putting on a VHS video about how babies are made. The three of us were wrinkle faced and embarrassed.

My mom was always very open about talking about sex, my dad was not. My parents were teen parents and they wished nothing more than their three daughters to reach their 20's before having kids (we did). I was always so embarrassed to talk about sex with my parents, though, and heaven forbid if there was kissing in a movie we were watching together...again, wrinkle faced and embarrassed, no matter how old I was.

The foundations of sex education starts at a young age in our schools. So my question is this: what is your opinion about sexual education being taught in early elementary school?

I remember being told I was going to be teaching Healthy Living to grade 7's, something I was extremely uncomfortable with. I was incredibly anxious to talk to other's kids about sex. Give me all forms of literature and facts about Canadian History but please for the love of god don't make me teach sex to adolescents. By the time the school year started, I was teaching a different course and Admin had given Healthy Living to another teacher who did a far better job of teaching kids about sex than I ever could at that time.

Related: Today's Parent: How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex: an age-by-age guide

Many parents are uncomfortable talking to their kids about anything to do with sex. Why? UNESCO, in their article Comprehensive sexuality education: For healthy, informed and empowered learners (2023), states that sexuality education:

✅ increases young people’s knowledge and improves their attitudes related to sexual and reproductive health and behaviors.

✅ leads to learners delaying the age of sexual initiation, increasing the use of condoms and other contraceptives when they are sexually active, increasing their knowledge about their bodies and relationships, decreasing their risk-taking, and decreasing the frequency of unprotected sex.

✅ that promotes abstinence as the only option have been found to be ineffective in delaying sexual initiation, reducing the frequency of sex or reducing the number of sexual partners.

✅ has the most impact when school-based programmes are complemented with the involvement of parents and teachers, training institutes and youth-friendly services. Parents and family members are a primary source of information, values formation, care and support for children.

How did you learn about Sex?

If this is the case, why is Sex Ed such a taboo topic? I believe it has to do with our own upbringing. Would I sit my 8 year old daughter on the floor and show her a video about how babies are made? No, but I will talk to her about it to help build trust and a healthy relationship when talking about sex. I want her to always feel comfortable coming to me about anything...yes, even sex.

Many kids are turning to the internet for information about sex and "UNESCO found that, in a year, 71% of youth aged 15-24 sought sexuality education and information online" (2023). Knowing how misleading online sources can be, this is a scary statistic. I would rather kids learn about the facts from teachers and parents over typing their questions into a search bar. Dr. Emily King (2022) wrote an article titled, How do I talk to my kids about sex? An age-by-age guide, where she talks about why we're so uncomfortable talking about sex and what information kids are ready for based on age. By knowing where to begin the conversation around sex, parents may feel more comfortable talking about it.

Sex Ed also teaches our children about what healthy relationships are and how one should feel while in a relationship. Read about the difference of a healthy vs. unhealthy relationship here.

In my observations of the Healthy Living classroom, most students are much more open when talking about sex and their relationships than I ever could have imagined when I was their age. Hopefully this will become more of the norm and, when our current students are older, they won't have a hard time discussing sex with their own children.

If you would like to read more about talking to your children about sex & relationships, here are a few more articles I've found that may be helpful:

• Choosing Therapy: How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex: An Age-by-Age Guide

• Kids Help Phone: Healthy relationships vs. unhealthy relationships

• Parenting.com: Building a Great Relationship with Your Child

• Kids Health Hub: Healthy Relationships